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Barker Eggs and Pooie Nappies

Owen Thomas - Barker Eggs and Pooie Nappies

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A couple of months ago I had to visit my neighbours just to sort out the stuff all neighbours go through. I am lucky my neighbours have been pretty good. My neighbours have a large Doberman, and as I approached their front door noticed that she had left several large deposits (poo if you will) strategically placed all around the front door. Potential land mines making the approach to the front door, in my opinion, a little hazardous. I wouldn’t want to get overly excited at the greeting, leading to a lapse of memory and…A squashed barker’s egg! Very, very unpleasant on a hot day, well any day really!

You get the picture. Been there – done that, you say. Well, that day I was fortunate, my neighbours saw me coming and walked out to greet me, walking around the deposits as if they were not there at all. They were obviously use to it.

Some three or four days later I had a follow-up call to our previous neighbourly duties. I approached my neighbour’s home with gay abandon. However, as I approached the front door I was confronted with another minefield – Barker’s eggs, some strangely familiar to me, the others obviously new deposits from the recently consumed tins of PAL.

It was obviously PAL as the size and texture was a giveaway. Again those dog lovers’ amongst you know what I mean.

I had my dress boots on and was a little concerned. However fate again was on my side my neighbours saw me coming and with great dexterity and ability, something that would have made any ballerina teacher impressed, navigated the hazardous journey. We completed our business, shook hands, and then they set out to complete the hazardous journey back as if the land mines were not there at all.

Some weeks later while I was sitting in peak hour track I found my self thinking about my neighbour and their agile ability. I found myself getting angry, and wondering why they never cleaned it up, why leave such a smelly mess at your front door, a disaster waiting to happen.

I could just see them rushing out the door one day late for work and stepping in poo, or rushing off to a wedding, all dressed up, and placing a very nice pair of high heels and toes right in it…. I was working myself into a frenzy.

I stopped myself. What was really going on here? It was their front door their life – they could live it any way they wanted – poo or no poo.

In the past when I have got excited or nick picked at someone else I have learned that it is an opportunity for me to take a look at myself and see if the same problem is somehow present in my own life. It might be in a different way but it will be there none the less.

My neighbours had obviously developed a habit of leaving their front door that way. They had also developed habits of dealing with it. They showed great ability and dexterity, in getting around the poo. They had become so good at it they were able to do it with ease – as if it was not there at all. They were completely blind to it, yet to a stranger it was apparent.

I thought I better take a look at my own life, see if I had developed habits of leaving problems unresolved. If life had been whispering about things I needed to take care of and I had developed great agility at avoiding the issues as opposed to cleaning up and taking care of it when the opportunity first presented. I looked at my family, my work life, and of course my home life. I wondered were there any bad habits I had let develop in my endeavours that were disasters waiting to happen. I decided to take a good look and so avoid any potential smelly mistakes.

And sure enough, there were a few areas, so I adopted the “do it now attitude” and got most of them out of the way, But like my neighbours and their high heels, I was to find I had left it a little too late….

Enter: The “Poohie” Nappy…..

I had traveled extensively for years, in and out of plans, hotels, hire cars, and I had been promising myself that I would put a special marker on my bags to make it easy to make a fast exit from the baggage carousel. I had been ignoring the incessant whisperings of my heart to do so. Instead, consoling myself with the fact that I purchased easily distinguishable bags and that I was very clever … Ha Ha.

I had just completed a rushed trip to the US, left on Thursday and returned on Monday and had gone straight home dropped the bags, and driven two hours to an urgent job in a country town.

I returned later that evening, ready but not eager to unpack the bags, – I would rather have gone to bed. However, I was greeted at the door with a somewhat unpleasant odour. It seemed to be coming from my bags, my easily distinguishable suitcase. The one I knew I could easily pick out on the carousel.When mistakes can be Made By Owen Thomas

I unzipped the bag and discovered that there was another easily distinguishable bag just like mine except for the owner of this suitcase had decided for reasons still, and will remain unknown, shipped several dirty and significantly “Poohie” nappies across the Pacific. And with the summer heat, they had been stewing all day. “Nice”! Very “Nice” indeed!

Needless to say, I made swift moves to replace the luggage with my own.

I now have easily distinguishable tags and coloured ribbons on my bags.

Each time I avoid something in the long grass or pavement, pick up a bag after traveling I use the occasion to check is there something in my life I’m not paying attention too, some part of my heart’s incessant whispering that I’m not paying attention too.

Given at the time of my writing my tax is due, I’d better get to it, in case the tax department decides to put something very unpleasant, no matter what the day, in my letter box.


Written By Owen Thomas


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